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How (Not) To Pick Up Chicks

from Fake Hits by Tiger Castle

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lyrics

Tell a joke and make her smile, I promise you it’s worth your while
Some roses and a box of sweets can really sweep her off her feet
So pay for dinner, I insist, cause later she’ll owe you a kiss
A smold’ring look, a turn of phrase can turn that into second base

If you wanna pick up chicks, you gotta turn on the charm
And put your game face on, so you can fuck her brains out
And nothing in the world can stop you now
Except your looks, your income, and the kind of car you drive

Tell her how you really feel, your honesty could seal the deal
But don’t be fooled if she refused, she’s secretly in love with you
Cause you oughta know that you’re God’s gift to women
you can nail a dozen of ‘em in the sack
but you shouldn’t worry about her personality, it only holds you back
So don’t forget to get your fill, the condom’s strictly optional

If you wanna pick up chicks, you gotta turn on the charm
And put your game face on, so you can fuck her brains out
And nothing in the world can stop you now
Except your looks, your income, and your basic hygiene, yeah

When she starts to pull away, then you can look for other strange
Then beg for her to take you back, they always fall for shit like that
So hear me out, I guarantee that you can be a stud like me

So if you wanna pick up chicks, you gotta turn on the charm
And put your game face on, so you can fuck her brains out
And nothing in the world can stop you now
Except your looks, your income, and the kind of car you drive
Your sense of humor and what brand of clothes you wear
But none of it matters with my winning strategy
As long as you got game

credits

from Fake Hits, released November 4, 2014
People Who Did Stuff:

Jon Urban: Electric Guitar, Bass, GarageBand Drums, Vocals

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Tiger Castle Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

"Music that makes you wanna play Tony Hawk's Pro Skater."

Power pop but dumber, pop punk without the baggage. If you like harmonized guitar leads, fast dense songs, sometimes being really dreamy, air-guitaring at the back of the basement show crowd, Jeff Rosenstock, Rozwell Kid, Diarrhea Planet, or PUP, you'll probably like us. Go Birds. ... more

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